Why Educating Myself on Bitcoin During Bathroom Breaks Isn't Going To Cut It
I totally want to invest in Bitcoin. I just need to look into it a little bit first.
I continue to reschedule the same “Look into Bitcoin” calendar notification, which has now spanned five jobs and multiple relationships. In all honesty, I’d like to look into Bitcoin and learn more about it, but it’s hard to find the time. Life just keeps rolling along, you know? I try to do a little digging whenever I can. Between customers. During bathroom breaks. Maybe even when there’s a dull moment behind the register.
But it’s tough when you’ve got a busy schedule. And when I’m sitting on the couch eating a stir fry at 9 p.m., and I get that notification, it’s like, “Damn! Bitcoin? That is the last thing I want to look into right now!” So I postpone it until the next morning, and the cycle continues.
My co-worker Devin suggests I stop doing this. He’s big into Bitcoin. I’ll occasionally find him talking to customers about the importance of decentralized cryptocurrencies in the context of the liberties that this country was founded upon. The customers probably didn’t ask him about this. It’s more likely they asked him about what gear they need for their first-ever camping trip in the Adirondacks. But Devin needs to get the word out, and I understand that. I asked Devin how much of my $1,400 stimulus check I should invest in Bitcoin. He said all of it. I said “Ah” or “Haha” or “Hehe” or something like that. Devin was not joking, though.
I would love to invest $1,400 in some Bitcoin. (Piece of a Bitcoin? I understand a single Bitcoin is a shit ton.) But first I’ve got to look into it a little bit. I know I’ve been saying that for a while now, but I really mean it. It’s just been so hard to carve out that time over the last several years. I know I said it’s all about those little moments, but that approach kind of sucks because you keep forgetting all the foundational Bitcoin stuff you just learned. For example, if I spend my first bathroom break of the day reading an article titled, “The Basics of Bitcoin,” guess what I’ll be reading during my next bathroom break two hours later? I’ll give you a hint: it’s not “The Basics of Bitcoin: Part 2.”
So anyway, here I am, still uneducated about Bitcoin’s advantages over the dollar. I remember telling my ex-girlfriend—not my last girlfriend but the one before that—that Bitcoin was the future and that I was going to do some serious research on it. She was like, “You should totally do that.” And I was like, “Yeah, I’m gonna.” Things didn’t work out between her and me, obviously. But I appreciated how she supported me wanting to get rich off Bitcoin. And it kind of bums me out that I haven’t even tried.
It makes me think about all those people who missed the gold rush. People assume that they must have been stupid not to get in on all those riches that were just floating around in rivers and stuff. But those people probably weren’t stupid. They probably just never got around to the gold rush because they already had a lot going on in general. And there’s nothing wrong with that. I imagine there would have been a lot to figure out in a short period of time. And with so many people going all-in, Googling “California” during bathroom breaks just wasn’t going to cut it.
I bet that’s how Devin sees me. The gold rush is in full swing, and I’m asking him whether $50 or $75 would be a better amount to invest in Bitcoin. “What an idiot,” he’s probably thinking. And he’s not totally wrong. If I’d invested $75 when I got the green light from my ex-girlfriend—not my last girlfriend but the one before that—I might be able to take it a little easier these days. But I didn’t do that. It’s not that I don’t care about Bitcoin or that I don’t want to get rich off it. I just need to look into it a little bit first. The good thing is that more and more of the apps on my phone are offering to buy Bitcoin for me. I’ve declined all of their offers so far, but I’m sure they will eventually start buying it for me anyway. Which might not be the worst thing. I’ll have an update for my ex-girlfriend. And Devin.