I Can't Wait to Get Back Out There and Start Needing People to Like Me Again
It's already happening.
I don’t know about you guys, but for me, this year has been such a journey in becoming content without the approval of others. While it was incredibly difficult to have those vital daily interactions with friends, family and co-workers suddenly stripped from me last spring, I also began to realize how influential other people’s opinions had been in shaping my own sense of purpose in the world.
I then embarked on a personal journey. It was painful at times, but I came out on the other side a stronger, more independent individual. I realized that I don’t need the favor of others to love and respect myself; I can do that all on my own. I am worth loving, I am worth respecting, and I have unique gifts I can share with the world. Even better, I’m hitting my stride right as this vaccine is becoming widely available. It feels like the stars are aligning for me, and that can only mean one thing: it’s time for me to get back out there and start needing people to like me again.
I can already feel it happening. As Trader Joe’s becomes more and more crowded on any given weeknight, I find myself saying “sorry” more and more frequently as I weave through the aisles of the store. “You don’t need to say sorry,” I’ll tell myself. And then I’ll say it again as I reach for a frozen lasagna, even though I’m at least three feet away from the guy perusing the pizzas. It’s a real shame, because I’d been doing so well with this kind of thing. After spending much of the last year strengthening my mind-body connection, I could feel myself becoming a more confident young man who didn’t have to apologize for his presence. But as New York experiences the renewal of life we’ve all been waiting for, the universe is making it clear: it’s time to remember that my primary role in society is to make sure I’m not bothering anyone.
As far as my journey of self-actualization, well, it’s been a good run. I feel so blessed for the growth that I’ve experienced during the last year. I’ve become more aware of what I want in life, who my true friends are, and where my strengths lie. And none of those things are contingent on how other people perceive me. You can’t put a price on freedom, and for me, there’s no greater freedom than freedom from the validation of my peers. I can’t even describe how liberating it is to try new things and give them my best effort, not caring at all whether anyone sees me fail. But seasons change. At a certain point, we all have to move on with our lives. And with the sun shining, people getting vaccinated, and cities beginning to bustle once again, it’s time for the opinions of others to reclaim their territory at the core of my sense of self.
We’re so close, guys. We can see the light at the end of the tunnel. Embrace it in whatever way feels right, because it’s going to look different for each of us. For some of you, it means getting back to second-guessing the emojis you include in texts to co-workers. For others, it means going downtown and being reminded of how many attractive people there are in the world, and how much more weight their viewpoints hold than yours. And some of you just need to be more like me, saying sorry for no reason to more and more pedestrians as they fill the sidewalks, just like old times.
Only you can decide how best to return to your former life of approval-seeking. It doesn’t matter how you do it. As long as we’re all doing it together, I guarantee we’ll be back to normal in no time. Just last night, I arrived at my apartment and realized I’d spent the entire walk home from dinner with an old friend wondering if he was still a fan of me as a person. Such thoughts hadn’t really occurred to me for most of the quarantine. But as I get back to booking little catch-up sessions with acquaintances, I find that these irrational fears are slowly but surely creeping back into my daily consciousness. I think it’s great that we’re all starting to get back out there, and I can’t wait to see each and every one of you. Seriously, hit me up! Let’s grab dinner sometime. Only if you want to, though.
It's encouraging to see a genuine humorist working in this space. Cheer on, sir.